Moved to Speak

Several years (over twenty now) I was caught up in the Community Building movement. I was a great fan of Dr. Scott Peck, the psychiatrist and author of The Road Less Traveled. I read every book he wrote, and I felt like I learned a lot from him. In some ways, I considered him a mentor from afar. In later books, including The Different Drum, Dr. Peck wrote about community, and how our world is in such desperate need of civility. I longed for the feeling of community, so I attended a Commuity Building Workshop at a retreat facility sponsored by The Foundation for Community Encouragement. Little did I know that I was on my path of partnership at that time.

One of the norms we followed in the community building circle was called Moved to Speak (mvd2spk). The idea being that there are so many words and voices when groups are together. People talk at the same time; often several conversations are going on within the same group. Who can really listen and pay attention? And that is the crux of it ... people talk, but no one listens. People tend to talk without thinking. There is so much "noise" that taking it all in can be a challenge. I love the idea of being "moved to speak." Why say something just to fill up the airwaves?

Meeting everyone's needs in a group can be tricky. This past week I led a group of twelve professionals in an institute which focused on working with adults. We all had lots of ideas and much to say. Early on, however, when we talked about our norms, someone asked that we honor the "2 Before Me" Rule. This rule is similar. This young lady said that she tends to talk a lot, and that remembering this rule helped her to pay attention to what others' have to say. It is very simple - let two other people talk before you say something. I then shared my thoughts about being moved to speak.

I think blogs and all the various types of social communicating allows us to express our voices. I hope that you may be moved to speak. What are your thoughts and ideas about helping adults working in groups to talk less and listen more? We would all be better for it, if we did more listening and less talking. I think that authentic caring and real listening are the foundations of building community and partnership with others.

"In and through community lie the salvation of the world."

M. Scott Peck, Introduction, The Different Drum